Archive for September, 2010

Master of the Jinn in Lego

Ever wondered how the cover of brother Irving Karchmar‘s Master of the Jinn would like? Well wonder no more!

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No Comment: Great Leader

Mubarak leads the way!

(Before)

(After)

I was initially planning to have the following two images without any commentary but then I realized that some people may not have heard about it. The story is funny, sad and shameful simultaneously. Just in case you have not heard about it before, what happened was that the Egyptian newspaper Al-Ahram ran a photo of President Obama, King Abdullah, Mehmud Abbas, Netanyahu and Mubrak. The photo was however photoshopped to make Mubarak seem as if he is walking in front of everyone including Obama. Thanks to the internet however the word got out that the picture was doctored. He is what the editor of Al-Ahram had to say afterwards ” expressionist photo is . . . a brief, live and true expression of Mubarak’s unique role in leading on the Palestinian issue. “

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Of course you have four of those!

This narrative is based on a true story.

Abu Pokemon: The lego figurines that I try to get have to be as diverse as possible but it is hard sometimes.
Person A: Home come?
Abu Pokemon: For example it is hard to get female figures.
Person A: How many do you have?
Abu Pokemon: I have a total of more than 30 figures but out of those only 4 are female.
Person A: It makes sense.
Abu Pokemon: What do you mean?
Person A: You are Muslim and you have four figures
Abu Pokemon: No, its a coincidence!
Person A: Of course it is.
Abu Pokemon: It is!
Person A: Right.
Abu Pokemon: I mean it!

This also reminded me of how back in the days, many of my conversations used to start like the following. It was pretty annoying at that time but in retrospect they are funny.

Random Person: So you are a Muslim.
Abu Pokemon:  Yes.
Random Person: Cool, so you can have four wives.
Abu Pokemon: Well, amm, theoretically yes.
Random Person: Dude that is so awesome.
Abu Pokemon: Well, why would you want to have more than one. Isnt it supposed to be hard to have one wife?
Random Person: It is very cool nonetheless!

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Eid Mubarak from Abu Pokemon!

Better late than never, Eid Mubarak to everyone!

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What not to do in Ramadan – The sequel

I usually dont do sequels but perhaps its not a bad idea. Mezba did a post on a similar topic to my previous post so I had no choice but to steal, err I mean borrow the post from Mezba. Here is Mezba’s post Legoized. (Just in case you folks are wondering I do have Mezb’a Blessing). Note to Mezba: I had to modify a couple of things in order to fit these in the lego world but the main theme is still the same.

Here are Mezba’s 5 tips for night prayer:

(1) Its not a hurdles competition

(1A) Jamil: Dang, I am late again. If the rate of blessing are inversely proportional to the distance from the imam then I wont reach my target tonight.

(1B) Luckily I am a pole vaulting champion.

(1C) Almost there.

(1D) Jamil: The engineering degree was going to come in handy one day.

(1e) Fill me up with blessings man. Woot!

(2) You are not having dinner:

Masud (The guy with the Turban): That was a yummy iftar.
Mezba (The buy with the big nice smile in the back) : I need to find a way to get to the front row.

(1b) Mezba (The buy with the big nice smile in the front): Front row, awesome.

(1c) Mezba: Why has that guy been burping the Ameen’ for the last 12 rakats.

(1d) Mezba in some fantasyland far away.

Mezba: Alright stormtroppers, I know the economy is tough so if you want to make a few bucks on the side, there is this guy at the masjid ….

(3) Allah loves cleanliness

(3a) (People in sajda while praying salat/namaz)

Behroz: What is that smell, oh God. Please help. I am suffocating.

(3b) Jamil: I dont know what that guy’s problem is what is standing behind me.

(3c) Congregation: Ina’lil’lah’wa’ina’ila’hi’rajioun. Masha’Allah he must have been a really pious brother. He must surely go to jannah (heaven) since he died while in prostration before God.

(4) Stop scaring the kids

(4a) Reyhan: I love being in the masjid, this is so fun.
Abdulrehman: (Better not cross me boy.)

(4b) Abdurrehman: That does it!

(4c) Abdurrehman: You stupid @#@% kid. Don’t cross in front of people who are praying. You deserve a sound beating!

(4d) 10 years later when Reyhan is passing by a masjid, this is what he is what comes to his mind when he thinks about the masjid.

(5) Sleep First

(5a) First Rakat:

Hashim: (I am getting a little sleepy.)

(5b) Second Rakat:
Hashim: (This must be a miracle, I am feeling sleepy and magically a support has appeared. All praise is to God.)
Muneeb: I am feeling sleepy.

(5c) Third Rakat:

Hashim: Zzzz ….
Muneeb: (This must be a miracle, I am feeling sleepy and magically a support has appeared. All praise is to God.)
Mezba: (If you have to sleep, please remain on your bed, not on my shoulder. There is actually a saying that you should not pray when you are sleepy. So either sleep before and then come to the mosque, or please stay in your bed.)

(5d) Later that night …

Mezba: Dr. Fransworth I have heard that you are looking for some test subjects for your sleep related research ….

To quote Mezba verbatim:

“To desi FOB uncles: If you follow the above tips, I am sure you can make your experience and the experience of the rest around you a lot better.”

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What not to do in Ramadan

I have not disappeared folks, it was just that I was busy in Thesis Proposal Exams and thus could not post in time. This post should have been done at least 10 days ago if not more when Ramadan/Ramazan had just started but since there is still a week left so better late than never. So here are a list of things that one should not do in Ramadan but people still do them.

(i) Stuff yourself

The point of fasting is to abstain from eating so that you can get close to God. The point is not to eat like a hog. Besides pigs are haram anyway so and is eating like them.

“Man I need to exercise yaani, I have yaani put on 20 pounds this Ramadan.”

(ii) Masjid Parking

If you have kids, a pregnant wife or sister or if you are pregnant, or have older parents or older relatives who are accompanying you then you should park close to the masjid or in the masjid parking lot. If one the other hand neither of these conditions are met then please refrain from parking since there are other people who are in such a position and so it is our duty as Muslims to give them parking space.

(iii) Dont be the Grinch who stole Ramadan

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) stated that smiling to your brother is charity. Some brothers have however taken it to themselves to have a grouchy face all day long.  Given that working all day without food and water can make some people grouchy but one is supposed to be extra nice to other people during Ramadan. So this Ramadan please dont be a Grinch, be nice. 🙂

Ali: As salam o alaikum
Ahsan: wa’alaikum Grrr
Ali: How are you?
Ahsan: Grrrrr
Ali: Emm, …, I think I hear my mom calling I will be back.
Ahsan: Grrrr

(iv) Musalla as playground

I am not saying that dont bring your kids to the mosque but if they are unruly and you cant make them keep it down when people are praying them please refrain from doing so because it disrupts other people’s players. One of the most annoying things to hear while praying is, “Veeeeeeeeee.”

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